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Casual Articles - How to Cope with a Spouse’s Negative Attitude
As children we all hear the question, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” So we grow up, we pick a career and work at it for a while. But then what? Does the choice we made at age 20 bind us until age 65?For many people that seems to be exactly what happens, and that’s a fine choice if you’ve made it consciously. But there’s no rule that says you have to pick one career and stick with it until you retire. You can enjoy many different careers if you so choose. Many people experience this by accident (such as when they lose a job), but you can also do it by choice.Sometimes young people are paralyzed when faced with choosing a lifetime career. Picking one thing means denying yourself everything else. What if you have a lot of different interests?Pick one career and get started. Go into it with the expectation of master
Listen to inspiring songs and read inspirational books. “Feed” yourself a diet of positive messages that encourage and motivate you.
3. Monitor your moods to be sure that you’re not getting tangled up in what are commonly called “co-dependency” issues. That’s when you let your mood be determined and set by someone else.
An example would be if you were depressed all day because your spouse was in a bad mood at breakfast. Just because he’s in a funk doesn’t mean that you can’t have an enjoyable day. You don’t have to let your mate’s mood determine your mood or spoil your day.
Don’t give away your personal power. Take responsibility for creating your o
Step 1 – Who is Your Target Market?If you don’t know who your clients are how do you know where to find them? This is a mistake I see many solo-professionals make.In their attempt to contact everyone you are actually targeting nobody. As the old adage goes: "when everybody's your customer, nobody's your customer". It’s what I call ‘spraying and preying’, and it inevitably results in increased marketing cost with fewer results.When you know exactly who your clients are, you will know where to find them, what the best medium for communicating with them will be and what matters to them most. Everything you do becomes more targeted thus cutting your marketing cost considerably.Some of the questions you might need to ask yourself are: -· Who is my typical client? · What gender are they? · What's
If so, it’s also quite possible that your spouse is just a negatively-oriented person about most things—work, the marriage, other people, the future, and life in general. Perhaps as time goes by, your spouse is becoming even more negative, critical, and complaining.
When I first talked to “Leigh” (not her real name), she was ready to leave her marriage because of her husband’s constant negativity. “Al” was a master at finding fault with Leigh’s decisions and suggestions. He had a sharp wit and could deliver zingers without batting an eye.
If Leigh suggested a picnic, Al responded with complaints about the perils of fire ants, killer bees, and sudden thunderstorms. Whenever she made a suggestion, Al would discourse on what was wrong with the idea and why it wouldn’t work.
If he did agree to go along with one of Leigh’s ideas or suggestions, he always expected the worse or talked about the negative aspects. In addition, Al was very critical.
The restaurant they tried was “too expensive,” the dinner conversation with friends was “too boring,” the movie was “too long,” the weekend camping trip was “too much work,” a gift from a family member was “stingy,” and the people at the church they visited were “hypocrites.” His boss is “an idiot,” his job “sucks,” and his life is “the pits.”
Since a negative attitude is highly contagious, it was challenging for Leigh to be around Al and not lose her normally positive orientation. She often felt drained and deflated in spirit after her interactions with Al. When she realized that he was becoming more negative the older he got and that she was starting to resent his attitude, she consulted with me.
Eight Steps to Overcome Negativity
If you’re in the same situation—married to a spouse with a negative attitude—I would give you the same recommendations that I gave Leigh. Here’s what you can do:
1. Deliberately cultivate friendships with other individuals and couples who have positive attitudes and who are fun to be around. Try to expand you and your spouse’s circle of friends to include couples who would be good role models for your mate and spend time with those couples.
Cut back on spending time with friends who encourage your spouse’s negative comments and attitude and slowly over time try to add individuals and couples who are strong positive influences.
2. Be sure that you have friends, activities, hobbies, and interests in your life that “feed your soul” and help you stay on a positive track. If things in your marriage aren’t what you wish they were, then you need to find satisfaction and joy in other areas to keep you centered and balanced emotionally.
Listen to inspiring songs and read inspirational books. “Feed” yourself a diet of positive messages that encourage and motivate you.
3. Monitor your moods to be sure that you’re not getting tangled up in what are commonly called “co-dependency” issues. That’s when you let your mood be determined and set by someone else.
An example would be if you were depressed all day because your spouse was in a bad mood at breakfast. Just because he’s in a funk doesn’t mean that you can’t have an enjoyable day. You don’t have to let your mate’s mood determine your mood or spoil your day.
Don’t give away your personal power. Take responsibility for creating your ow
More than 1.3 million .EU domain extensions have already been registered according to Eurid. Most of them, about 700,000 are registered on the first day when any European citizen was allowed to apply.The German consumers were leading the race for new names in their first registration day.The .EU "land rush" period began on 7 April and followed a 4 month "sunrise" period that was open only to holders of trademarks. Many European businesses has already gained control over domains relevant to their brands.About 300 000 .EU domains were registered during the "sunrise", but this number was outrun within the first four "land rush" hours. At this time were registered 702 684 domains. The first five applications filled in on the start of the open .EU registration period weredekoration.eu, buchung.eu, tankstellen.eu, exhibiti
If he did agree to go along with one of Leigh’s ideas or suggestions, he always expected the worse or talked about the negative aspects. In addition, Al was very critical.
The restaurant they tried was “too expensive,” the dinner conversation with friends was “too boring,” the movie was “too long,” the weekend camping trip was “too much work,” a gift from a family member was “stingy,” and the people at the church they visited were “hypocrites.” His boss is “an idiot,” his job “sucks,” and his life is “the pits.”
Since a negative attitude is highly contagious, it was challenging for Leigh to be around Al and not lose her normally positive orientation. She often felt drained and deflated in spirit after her interactions with Al. When she realized that he was becoming more negative the older he got and that she was starting to resent his attitude, she consulted with me.
Eight Steps to Overcome Negativity
If you’re in the same situation—married to a spouse with a negative attitude—I would give you the same recommendations that I gave Leigh. Here’s what you can do:
1. Deliberately cultivate friendships with other individuals and couples who have positive attitudes and who are fun to be around. Try to expand you and your spouse’s circle of friends to include couples who would be good role models for your mate and spend time with those couples.
Cut back on spending time with friends who encourage your spouse’s negative comments and attitude and slowly over time try to add individuals and couples who are strong positive influences.
2. Be sure that you have friends, activities, hobbies, and interests in your life that “feed your soul” and help you stay on a positive track. If things in your marriage aren’t what you wish they were, then you need to find satisfaction and joy in other areas to keep you centered and balanced emotionally.
Listen to inspiring songs and read inspirational books. “Feed” yourself a diet of positive messages that encourage and motivate you.
3. Monitor your moods to be sure that you’re not getting tangled up in what are commonly called “co-dependency” issues. That’s when you let your mood be determined and set by someone else.
An example would be if you were depressed all day because your spouse was in a bad mood at breakfast. Just because he’s in a funk doesn’t mean that you can’t have an enjoyable day. You don’t have to let your mate’s mood determine your mood or spoil your day.
Don’t give away your personal power. Take responsibility for creating your o
Everything man does when it comes to women he does because it either moves him towards pleasure with women or moves him away from pain with women, at least that is what he believes.For some men this kind of belief system works great and his success with women is all the proof he needs to continue believing.But, what if your belief system actually has you moving towards pain and away from pleasure with women?You can find yourself frustrated and confused until you are consciously able to break free from your old beliefs that aren't working when it comes to women.Of course, knowing which beliefs are actually holding you back when it comes to attracting women can be hard to discover; especially when so many of the limiting beliefs are not only held by men and women alike but your circle of influence as well.So how
Since a negative attitude is highly contagious, it was challenging for Leigh to be around Al and not lose her normally positive orientation. She often felt drained and deflated in spirit after her interactions with Al. When she realized that he was becoming more negative the older he got and that she was starting to resent his attitude, she consulted with me.
Eight Steps to Overcome Negativity
If you’re in the same situation—married to a spouse with a negative attitude—I would give you the same recommendations that I gave Leigh. Here’s what you can do:
1. Deliberately cultivate friendships with other individuals and couples who have positive attitudes and who are fun to be around. Try to expand you and your spouse’s circle of friends to include couples who would be good role models for your mate and spend time with those couples.
Cut back on spending time with friends who encourage your spouse’s negative comments and attitude and slowly over time try to add individuals and couples who are strong positive influences.
2. Be sure that you have friends, activities, hobbies, and interests in your life that “feed your soul” and help you stay on a positive track. If things in your marriage aren’t what you wish they were, then you need to find satisfaction and joy in other areas to keep you centered and balanced emotionally.
Listen to inspiring songs and read inspirational books. “Feed” yourself a diet of positive messages that encourage and motivate you.
3. Monitor your moods to be sure that you’re not getting tangled up in what are commonly called “co-dependency” issues. That’s when you let your mood be determined and set by someone else.
An example would be if you were depressed all day because your spouse was in a bad mood at breakfast. Just because he’s in a funk doesn’t mean that you can’t have an enjoyable day. You don’t have to let your mate’s mood determine your mood or spoil your day.
Don’t give away your personal power. Take responsibility for creating your o
So you wanna be a successful Internet marketer? You want a killer website, with droves of traffic. You want to build a database of thousands of subscribers. And you want to market products that sell like hot-cakes.But the reality is, you're website traffic is exclusive to your own IP address, you and your friends and family are the only subscribers in your database and you can't even give your products away!What the #@!! are you thinking?Are you thinking success, solutions and opportunities.Or are you're thoughts centered around fear, doubt, worry, feeling unworthy, discouraged, or overwhelmed, or worse yet, failure?Did you ever stop to think what an important part your thoughts -----concentrated thoughts---- play in your life?What we think, is what we do, and what w
Cut back on spending time with friends who encourage your spouse’s negative comments and attitude and slowly over time try to add individuals and couples who are strong positive influences.
2. Be sure that you have friends, activities, hobbies, and interests in your life that “feed your soul” and help you stay on a positive track. If things in your marriage aren’t what you wish they were, then you need to find satisfaction and joy in other areas to keep you centered and balanced emotionally.
Listen to inspiring songs and read inspirational books. “Feed” yourself a diet of positive messages that encourage and motivate you.
3. Monitor your moods to be sure that you’re not getting tangled up in what are commonly called “co-dependency” issues. That’s when you let your mood be determined and set by someone else.
An example would be if you were depressed all day because your spouse was in a bad mood at breakfast. Just because he’s in a funk doesn’t mean that you can’t have an enjoyable day. You don’t have to let your mate’s mood determine your mood or spoil your day.
Don’t give away your personal power. Take responsibility for creating your o
The following article is one of a series of articles which focus on Affiliate, Article and Internet Marketing. All of the articles are based on real experiences and research done over twenty years as a personal and business coach. They are also written in response to questions which I have been asked as well as address common challenges that people have with affiliate marketing, article marketing, internet marketing or running an online business in general. I sincerely hope that you find the following information of value. One idea, one tip, one clue can make all the difference.3 Indispensible Tools For Successful Affiliate MarketingWhat does it take to become a successful Affiliate Marketer? What are the ingredients of an affiliate marketing success story? Is there a shortcut to Affiliate Marketing glory? All these quest
Listen to inspiring songs and read inspirational books. “Feed” yourself a diet of positive messages that encourage and motivate you.
3. Monitor your moods to be sure that you’re not getting tangled up in what are commonly called “co-dependency” issues. That’s when you let your mood be determined and set by someone else.
An example would be if you were depressed all day because your spouse was in a bad mood at breakfast. Just because he’s in a funk doesn’t mean that you can’t have an enjoyable day. You don’t have to let your mate’s mood determine your mood or spoil your day.
Don’t give away your personal power. Take responsibility for creating your own happiness instead of being so influenced by your spouse’s negative attitude.
4. Keep a gratitude journal where you list what you’re thankful for each day. Form the habit of sharing with your spouse things that you’re thankful for. At dinner, for example, you might talk about how helpful the clerk at the grocery store was or tell about the favor a co-worker did for you that you appreciate.
If you’re thankful for seeing a beautiful bird or a lovely flowering tree, share your feelings. If you feel blessed by the kindness of a friend, share that. Even if what you say doesn’t impact your mate, you need to hear yourself expressing gratitude and appreciation for the gifts that you’ve been given. This helps you to keep focused on what’s right with your life instead of what’s wrong with it.
5. Try not to judge your spouse or make him or her “wrong” for being so negative. There are many factors that can influence a person’s attitudes: the attitudes they learned from their parents, their experiences growing up, low self-esteem, intense stress, clinical depression, a habit of negative self-talk, life disappointments and discouragement, and lack of hope.
Sometimes individuals who are negative think they are being “realistic” or helpful by “calling a spade a spade.” Others may think they are witty for delivering clever “zingers” and criticisms.
6. Schedule a time to talk to your partner about your concerns. Without sounding judgmental or “preachy,” give some specific examples of how her (or his) negativity has impacted you significantly. Perhaps your spouse is not even aware of just how negative she has become, or perhaps she is feeling depressed and needs to talk to her doctor or a counselor.
If your spouse reacts in anger, stay calm and non-defensive. State that you’d rather share your feelings now than have them fester underground and cause even more problems later.
7. If nothing changes after your talk with your spouse, write him (or her) a letter outlining your feelings and concerns about your reactions to his negative attitude. State that you want to look forward to your interactions and time with him, but you’re afraid the constant negativity will eventually affect your feelings.
In the letter, tell your spouse how much you value him and your marriage and that you love him deeply. Ask your mate to go to marriage counseling with you so that your marriage will stay strong and satisfying for both of you.
8. If your spouse is not willing to address the problem by talking with you or going to counseling, then make an appointment to see a counselor by yourself. You’ll need support and help in determining just what the next step needs to be—trying again to communicate verbally or in writing, or trying to adjust and live with
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